I don’t have pet peeves — I have major psychotic fucking hatreds! Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense! A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. I wanna live. I don’t wanna die. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade. Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff? I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I’m an American — you know, you grow. You can’t fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up. If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play? Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. No one knows what’s next, but everybody does it. |
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